Slow down, you move too fast

This summer (8 months ago) a friend gave me a book called Slow is beautiful. I’ve been too busy to read it. But now, I’m finally starting to realize my need for slow. It is not as strong as my need of silence (I tend to get that on a daily basis after ever one else has gone to sleep.) I would truly starve without silence at some point in my day. But now after 8 months of intense speed (major renovation and starting a high profile business) I’m starting to hope for a more sustainable rhythm.

Even as my friend handed me the book, she said that we were entering a season where this book might seem impossible. Maybe now I can find the book again under the piles of 8 months of clutter.

What started this need, this pull my nose off the grindstone? I cleaned my office. Once the clutter was reduced, a rhythm, a system found it’s place. It’s only about a 4 foot square corner of control. But now I’ve maintained it for a total of 4 days! There is a freedom in a bit of rules. Leave the desk as clean as you found it. File it! Take action.

Admittedly it’s only been 4 days. True, it’s only 4 feet square. I’ve got a whole house to deal with now. And that is just physical space. What about my spirit? My body? My finances? My relationships? There’s a lot of clutter that has been shelved and piled these past 8 months. God, I get overwhelmed when I think about the energy and effort to pull things back to reasonable speed and order. Hell, it took me 2 days to clean and organize my desk.

I’m grateful for the groundwork God has done in me over the years. His instilling in me a love of nature, community and peace will continue to be my pillars as I rebuild. A great strength is that we are surrounded by amazing folks who hold to similar values, a beautiful landscape to get lost in, and hearts begging for inner peace. I’m not going to make goals, resolutions or promises of daily updates on my progress. That would just add to the overwhelmingness . For now it is just enough to state that I am ready to begin the process and acknowledge the need of slow.

The view from my window

Yeah, the view from my window has changed.

Actually, the window I look out the most has changed. I used to gaze out our dining room window at my three little ones playing on the swingset. I am soooo thankful for the time I got to spend with them when they were little. Good soil for my little ones. Now, they're all in grade school.

After two weeks of Christmas vacation at home with the kiddos, it's back to the regularly scheduled program. We all wake up and head out the door at the same time. They to fill their heads with knowledge. I to fill empty coffee cups with great coffee and hopefully a drop of love|peace too. I missed all my people at the shop. I really feel that God has placed me where I belong right now. Those mothering skills of the past 11 years go really well into the customer service realm. 3 different kids= 3 different sandwiches. 3 different customers=3 different drinks. Oops...a dropped glass jar of peanut butter. Oops....a dropped ceramic cup. (Actually, it was me who broke a cup today!)

I find some of the same "mothering hen" emotions come into play at the shop, too. If I have a regular customer who doesn't show up for a while, I start to worry a bit. After a well played music gig, I rejoice for the success of the musician. I love gazing out around the shop and seeing my community connecting. Yeah, the window is different, but the view is pretty much the same